REFLECTION: Lessons to Self

December can be a time of reflection, review and regrouping.  2015 was a wonderful year with many valuable lessons.  As my personal ‘odometer’ rolled over to 60 this year, I thought I’d do a year-end blog of 60 lessons life has taught me.  They range from soul-touching, to simple common sense, to sassy truths.

1. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer
2. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone
3. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does
4. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile
5. A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write.
6. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie – don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
7. Over-prepare, then go with the flow
8. The most important sex organ is the brain
9. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: “In five years, will this matter”
10. Let go. Forgive everyone everything
11. What other people think of you is none of your business
12. Time heals almost everything. Give time, time.
13. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful
14. When the pie shrinks, table manners matter
15. However good or bad a situation is, it will change
16. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
17. If we all throw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back
18. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved
19. The power of consistency will be transformational
20. Do you want to be right or happy?
21. A smile in an inexpensive way to improve your looks
22.Stop telling people what is wrong, people don’t like that
23. Trying to hide something doesn’t mean other people don’t see it
24. When you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere
25. Vision without execution is hallucination
26. You can’t build a reputation on what you’re going to do
27. If you judge people, you have no time to love them
28. Never confuse motion with action
29. Self-consciousness is the enemy of ‘interestingness’
30. Don’t be the last dog at the bowl

31. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
32. If you don’t ask, you don’t get
33. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present
34. Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk
35. If you’re not at the table, you’re probably on the menu
36. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer
37. When you lose, don’t lose the lesson
38. Memorize your favorite poem
39. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck
40. Don’t take anything personally
41. Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly
42. When you say “I love you” mean it
43. When you say “I’m sorry” look the person in the eye
44. Never pretend to be something you’re not
45. It takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it
46. Avoid biting when a simple growl will do
47. Money is a lousy way of keeping score
48. You can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you’d better know something.
49. Action is the antidote for despair
50. The best way to feel better about yourself is to do something worthy of your own respect
51. Acknowledging that you’re stuck is the very first step in getting unstuck
52. Not trying guarantees you won’t get what you want
53. Comparison is the death of joy
54. If you can’t change their minds, change their faces
55. It’s not that we dream big and miss, it’s that we dream small and hit
56. When you know better, you will do better
57. Failure is not final or fatal
58. Fear makes strangers of those who would be friends
59. Bystanders do not make history
60. Change your choices; change your life

Sometimes a gentle reminder or new wording can open a door for us to walk through. Perhaps you’ll carry a few of these with you in 2016.

There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it.

Edith Wharton

Starting in January, back by popular demand, I will launch a new acronym-based blog series – stay tuned.

Check out the website, and unlock the leader inside you!

I invite you to email me,, your favorite lessons from the top 60 list.

~ Victoria Raymont